Thursday, October 1, 2009

Holidays in the Sun - G20 memories

Has it been a week already? it must be cuz i don't see nearly as many cops all dolled up in riot gear nor do i see vegan kids all dressed in black running around all willy nilly, last thursday was like Mardi Gras in Bloomfield, all the locals filing in to bars to watch the protesters run this way and that way and this way and that way and god how summits implore you to let yourself be yourself, whoops Mozzer moment, while the riot grrrls aka John Q. Law ran this way and that way and this way and that way and god how billy clubs implore you to break some skulls break some skulls, ooops more Mozzer moments, while the indigenous people all stood, pints in hand watching some strange version of the Keystone Kops/ Protester follies, surreal, just a bit, it's not every day that i get to see Humvees with mounted machine guns and 60 odd riot police marching down my street all Pink Floyd like smacking said clubs off their armor just waiting for someone to step out of line, i myself stood on my porch with a baby in one hand and a PBR in the other watching the fun, sometimes i took a little video and at one point i dragged Kid A and Kid B out in the middle of it until of course the tear gas rumor started and my brilliant parental instincts told me that maybe i should get the kiddies off the streets and let them watch cartoons, much like dad was doing on the front porch.

As i count down the days to Forty i guess i've become a bit jaded or maybe alot jaded as i just don't give a shit anymore, don't get me wrong i'm sure i would've been tossing bricks and baiting police 10 or 15 years ago it's just the more i learn the less interested i am in all things political, it's pissing in the wind, you want a voice? get rich and donate money, follow the money and you find who really runs things, politicians these days are figureheads for the boardroom boys until of course the Private jet set fuck up so bad that the pols have to do something and i'm a firm believer in getting inside the system and spreading the disease, the thinking disease that is, it's hard of course cuz H'america is a land of dumb fucking stumps but as i like to point out the flu virus doesn't do shit floating through the air, only when you get it inside does it wreak havoc, so while i give the vegan kids credit for their enthusiasm i question the effectiveness of their methods.

That said the mob mentality that seems to prevail in situations like this was on full display by the lovely boys in blue, many of who volunteered to show up for the chance to beat the shit out of those vegan kids and anyone else who stumbled upon the blue rage that takes hold once the first window is smashed, i mean really some of these boys have been waiting their whole life for the chance to fire rubber bullets and beanbags or use the club on unwashed heads, do you really think they would pass up the chance? shit all you had to do was say hi or ask directions and you had a 50/50 chance of being arrested, they eyeballed me and i was holding a baby for shit sake, i'm sure there were some nice guys running around in full riot gear it's just like the protesters though, only takes a few bad ones to divert all attention and start the ball rolling, seems they really liked beating up the college kids over in Oakland but hell i've thought about that myself a few times, needless to say John Q. did his fair share of oppressing and dare i say law breaking and rights violating but in these little fiasco's no one comes out smelling like roses.

Now on to the Marchers. There were dozens of marches all protesting different things and a few marches protesting everything, what they need is a management and organization course to work out the kinks, i can't tell you what any of them were about cuz well i don't think the people in them really knew, which brings up the point that if you put your face on the news and try to talk about protesting the event you really should have some fucking knowledge of what's going on instead of stammering like a jackass about uh like global warming and uh banks and uh Cuba, really kids read a fucking newspaper, try the internet or better yet don't do the fucking interview and do a disservice to the people who are marching and do actually know something about the fucking topic, find the guy in the gas mask who looks like he's running shit and get him to do it, yes he can leave the gas mask on so he may remain anonymous.

The kids also need to learn how to police themselves cuz when the first Asshat tosses a brick through the first window all they hope to accomplish goes pfffft, cuz the media loves nothing more than showing smashed glass and kids all dolled up in black in Anarchy t-shirts, once again a little education may help, most anarchists are not about destroying things they would just like government to stay out of their lives, sounds like the Republicans really now doesn't it? but when you misinterpret the lyrics of John Lydon, suddenly get all righteous and shit and start tossing bricks you reduce your cause to a sound bite, a quick question? who were the most effective leaders of social change? MLK? Gandhi? The Jesus? what did they have in common? Non-violence perhaps? i give credit to the geezer who just sat down in the middle of the street in front of the police trucks, went all Tianeman square on their ass, that one image is more powerful than all the bricks kids, shows a bit more conviction cuz he KNOWs he's going to jail and doesn't care that they see his face, civil disobedience at it's finest.

Now when the "Anarchists" start tossing what the vegan kids need to do is grab them and shove them towards the cops, first it creates goodwill (well maybe see above paragraph about overzealous cops) second it keeps your march/protest front and center instead of "hey look at these anarchists destroying banks and Boston Markets and a local pancake house", and really when you smash up the local shit your line of "we hate corporations" goes right out the fucking windows you nitwits, those people who own it are not corporations and have loans and families and what not, also when you smash joints up the people who really get fucked are the lumpen proles manning the counter and working the fryer, they need the money trustafari, they don't have time to gallivant around the country protesting shit cuz they have kids and bills and rent to make and when you take away their ability to work what happens? you gonna pay their rent and bills?

which brings us finally to the professional protester. i know we all need a job but i prefer one where i get paid and how do these "pros" make any money, i met a few who went from place to place protesting whatever happened to be on the menu that day, i mean what the fuck? i'm sure we could all protest something every day, like assholes on cellphones who talk to loud, the incompetence of our boss, flowers, college football, baking soda, i mean the list is endless, it takes away the legitimacy to find out that a whole subset of protesters are hired guns so to speak, if i'm passionate about something i'll stand up and voice my opinion and march and sing and back it financially, i don't however protest shit just cuz i have nothing better to do, cuz at the first of the month i'm getting my stipend from mom and dad and now i'm going to Florida to save the Manatees ( a friendly sea cow who needs saving) since the economic summit's over, that just show's me how fucked it all is, in a nutshell.

So the big show has come and gone and now Pittsburgh is back to the same peaceful little city we all know and love, thankfully no hipster bars were damaged during the g-20 so the kids will have someplace to go to regale each other in tales of billy clubs narrowly missed and friends who were arrested and what Nazi's the law are and all kinds of fun stuff, i myself will miss all the action, i harassed everyone at some point, cops and protesters alike, i'm fair like that. G-20 we barely knew ya.

and one more thing... Woodie Guthrie got alot more accomplished with his guitar than any brick wielding idiot ever did.


Anonymous said...

amen. if the civil rights folks in the 60's had been this retarded? we'd still have "whites only" restrooms...

the left wingnuts just can't get their shit together... it's embarassing, really.

Anonymous said...

mounted machine guns? Shit!

Gulfboot Johnson said...

Go Stillers!