Dominican Dirt pt. 1

To say there was an art to scoring is a bit of an overstatement and yet  there is a bit of an art to scoring, granted it's more commerce-centric than artistic but i've known people who were just absolute shit at finding and procuring anything, there is an unspoken language, a mixture of facial expressions and subtle movements, an aura of quiet confidence and fearlessness that helps drive one through the process, granted sometimes it's out of necessity as with the junkie, a more need based thing, and sometimes it's more out of want, you want something, a little grass or some blow or a bit of adventure... which brings me to how i spent my summer vacation, well not all of it of course, really it was no more than an hour or two all told but in the end i walked away with my Dominican dirt and even had a little adventure and story by the time it was all said and done... part comedy, part drama, part adventure, part B-movie...

Somewhere east of Haiti, across some mountains and heading south toward the Caribbean Sea one finds a stretch of beautiful beaches, the sand a fine powder and the sea a lovely pale blue, all gobbled up by international conglomerates and given fancy tropical names to appeal to fucking suburbanites like me, along with the odd Rusky and occasional Euro, a bevy of South Americans, an interesting place to hang at the bar and wander between the South Americans watching futbol and the Yanks watching basketball, it was my first full day and that night my beloved Cavs would be on the telly and though i had a wrist band that let me drink all i could possibly guzzle i still needed my smoke, or maybe not needed but definitely desired, having kicked cigarettes a while back and slowed my drinking down to a crawl for the most part i didn't want to spend the week in a half drunk half hungover haze, i wanted to enjoy this time and i knew it would be much more enjoyable stoned...

The first thing one has to do the day after they arrive is schedule the transport to the airport for the departing flight, of course i volunteered right off to wander up to the desk and arrange this because having done my research i discovered that in the DR one could obtain certain painkillers over the counter and being the consummate wastoid i decided why not tie two loose ends up first thing and so before i went to the desk i walked across the street to a mall, one i believe specifically built for tourists with a bunch of high end shops but also with supermarket and a pharmacy where i was hoping to find the pills that i had read about, all perfectly legal to buy over the counter and all loaded with codeine, for hangovers of course... and any other minor aches and pains, real or otherwise, that might arise, so i walked on over, the day's heat already coming up and a fine layer of sweat clinging to my body, i made a quick lap around the place glancing at the stores until i saw the familiar red cross and the words la farmacia written next to it...

The total amount of products in a Dominican pharmacy amounts to what would roughly fit in half an aisle at the local Walgreen's, it's got some lotions and soaps and shit locked in cabinets and then a counter where all the drugs are kept, both over the counter and prescription, i sauntered around the locked island in the middle of the store glancing at the names of things and then finally made my way over to the counter, first i asked about stomach medicine, half ass Pepto or some shit i didn't need and had no intention of buying, it was here the language barrier was established and a friendly woman stepped in to help, they handed me a packet of something and i looked at it and then handed it back, i turned to the woman and told her that i had back pain too, and needed something, something strong, the girl behind the counter looked at her and then at me and grabbed a box of something and immediately went to ring it up, i gestured to her to stop and asked to read the box, i leaned on the counter pretending to be in discomfort and scanned the ingredients label looking for the magic words, as usual i needed to be a bit more conscientious in my pre-trip studies and my slack note-taking and memory had me fucking all Chevy Chase, finally i gave up and handed the box back, thanked the counter girl and the lady and pretend hobbled toward the door thinking to myself, that was an absolute disaster you fucking knob end...

All this of course took maybe fifteen minutes and seeing how this little mission needed to be done a bit clandestinely it left me ample time to hit the bar, albeit at 9:30 in the morning, for a quick beer or two, i had half and hour and needed to take the edge off the heat and so i pulled up a fine wooden chair at an expensive looking cheap bar, the wood the color of dark chocolate, i drank from my first glass of beer thinking of the failed mission, i scanned the tourists and workers around the half moon and listened to conversations, actually thought of bumming a cigarette but then stopped and thought better of it, finished my first beer and then ordered a second and that's how i met Luciano...