Monday, June 18, 2007

Revisionist History --me and pcp-- pt. 1

It's early morning and i've just finished scamming the register at the local 7-11, it's about the only perk of the job other than free porn, stealing beer and snatching cartons of cigarettes, so on second thought maybe the job doesn't suck but the graveyard shift is putting a serious cramp in my partying and riding the sixty some odd blocks to work stoned and drunk would seem dangerous if i were not completely oblivious to the danger.

It doesn't help to leave every party to go to work and it's painful cuz the parties are just getting good when i have to leave and some are still going when i get off but by that time it's slim pickens and most of the stragglers are tripping there brains out and the sort of charming young lady still available at time of day i would need 8 solid hours of boozing before going to bed with, i mean i'm not a snob or anything but in Ocean City at 7am the beauties have all sacheyed off with some other white knight and the mongrels roamed the room picking up the scraps but it was my 4th job and it was only June and the skimming off the top made my hourly wage go from $6 to about $20. So in order to keep my one room joint with the bathroom down the hall i go.

Rainy Ocean City mornings are the best cuz the tourists all stay indoors and the crowds don't suffocate like the usually do so i trudged up the steps and was all set to smoke a joint and drink my forty and listen to Jane's Addiction or Pavement until i was summoned in to the next room by my lawyer Mikhail Hornfrog. Mikhail was standing with Skinhead Will and The Melvis and they looked more than just a tad fucked, in fact all Mikhail could say was "you gotta try this, you gotta try this", Melvis just grinned and nodded and put on his sunglasses and Skinhead Will said "Want Some?" Never being one to be impolite i said sure.

Cue "Tales of Great Ulysees" by Cream now.

Skinhead Will packed what smelled like a combination of kitchen cleaner and jet fuel into a bowl, it looked like little parsley flakes and i took and figured how bad could this be and went to work blasting the whole thing to my head, the whole time getting shorter and shorter with each hit, the strange taste of industrial chemical in my mouth, the weird distortion of the room as i suddenly was only waste high to my friends, somewhere in the confusion that was overtaking my synapses like a runaway tsunami i asked what was that? Greens...came the answer, uh, how much did you guys smoke, we split the bowl laughed Mikhail, Wow Skinhead Will said, you smoked that whole thing yourself... you're gonna be fucked. Laughter all around, and like the beloved Galen once said, you gotta dance with who you came to the dance with, so i cracked the forty, turned on the tunes, looked Miss Mephistopheles right in the eye and said shall we?